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creative writing mental health poetry

Sunset Over The Water

Scenic View of Ocean During Sunset
The gulls cry out with shrieks of sorrow.
The waves sound softly against the shore
As the sun sets across the water.
Feel the soft breeze whisper through your hair.

One thing I always miss about the beautiful summer nights is the sunsets. My favorite place to watch them is at the lake while sipping wine on the private beach.

My husband’s family has a cabin at Jackfish Lake which is part of Meota but just on the other side of that lake. It’s the one place I feel completely relaxed and in tune with myself. I feel this way anywhere in nature really but but the water is where I’m most content. I haven’t been in the water for longer than I can remember and my anxiety gets too high with just the thought of going in. I can’t imagine why.

While I’ve been working on healing past traumas and wounds, this realization kept nagging at me. I used to love the water. I would go swimming for hours and my mom would have to bribe me to get out of the lake. Swimming pools aren’t even close to being the same thing. My family would call me a fish or a mermaid since I spent so much time in the water. Somewhere along the way something happened to cause a fear of being in the water. Hopefully I can get past this fear and enjoy some more time in the water.

Have a wonderful and safe day my friends!

-Ang

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One Month Later…

It’s so hard to believe that it had been one whole month since I had been at work. It was bittersweet to be back there over the weekend. I had a lot of anxiety about going out, probably not for the normal reasons though.

My biggest fear?

Slipping. Getting to my car at home and slipping. Slipping in the parking lot at work. Slipping in the store because of the wet crutches. The thought of the pain that would incur was unbearable. I slipped while I had gone to vote and at that moment I realized that I would have to be extra careful on the floors at work.

Yes, I slipped a multitude of times! Since I was going slow I was able to catch myself though without any problem. Still scary!

I did too much, but that’s something I wouldn’t haven known if I didn’t try. I ran till, covered the front desk, covered supervisor breaks, a little of everything that I would normally do. By Sunday night when I got home I was in tremendous pain and Monday I stayed on the couch for the most part. Tuesday I was still paying for it and laid in bed as much as I could. I’ll do less for my next shifts haha!

What About Them Numbers Eh?

The numbers in the area I live in (North West 1) was at 18 active cases and 5 new as of yesterday. The North Battleford area (North West 4) where I work was at 67 active cases and 7 new. The province was up 240 new cases which was 59 more than the day before. Canada’s numbers the last I checked were 307,594 confirmed cases and 245,647 recovered. These were the stats for November 17. Schools continue to report cases. Lloyd has 7 schools with one or more case, Saskatoon I lost count honestly, Humbolt has one, Ituna has one, Martensville has closed it’s school again due to an outbreak, North Battleford has 4 schools with at least one case, Moose Jaw with 4, Prince Albert and Regina with too many too count as well.

No cases yet in the school where my boys go. There’s one confirmed case in town though. My oldest says he’s still okay at school, he’ll wait until the school closes to stay home. I make sure to talk regularly to them all about it and how they feel.

Wherever you are, I hope you’re staying safe and healthy! Have a great day friends 🙂

-Ang

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(Re-blog) Pear Clafoutis with Whipped Mascarpone

This is a beautiful recipe with a video to go along with it. If you haven’t come across Rebecca’s blog yet, I urge you to check it out! I hope you enjoy this recipe as much as I did 😀

Cerise Chérie

At the market last week there were these huge bins of pears. They were all so beautiful in jewel tones of ruby, emerald and topaz, I couldn’t resist buying way more than we needed. Where some have a weakness for jewelry or an addiction to well-made handbags, I have a thing for pears. That’s not to say that I don’t appreciate the craftsmanship of an Hermès Kelly bag, or that I would turn down a diamond if offered, but there is something so aesthetically satisfying in a bowl overflowing with pears. Like a Baroque era still life, I love to have big bowls of seasonal fruit sitting in the centre of the table and on the counter tops. It’s part of the ever-changing landscape of our kitchen. The thing about pears, though, is, like avocados, they ripen and then turn in the blink of an eye. When I saw that…

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Remember

I don’t feel adequately equipped to go into writing about all the heartfelt, important things that are filling the internet and social media today. Instead I want to tell you about one of the most important people that have helped form who I am today. One that I don’t often think of anymore because no one else I talk to knew him. He’s been gone for so long now, 26 years, but I still remember his smile and his eyes and his crazy, fun ties that he would wear with his colorful knitted sweaters. And his hat. I remember his hat.

Every Sunday after church he would treat me to MacDonald’s even though my parents always said it cost too much. Back then there was a Ronald MacDonald sitting on a bench that you sit next to and have your picture taken. At the front of the restaurant there was a phone that the kids could use to “call” Ronald. Sunday’s were always my favorite day of the week.

My most treasured memories of him are the times that I would hop up on his lap and he would read his favorite Bible passages to me. He would let me play his guitar and the piano anytime I wanted and he would sit right there with me with such patience. That very piano is sitting in my living room right now and when I’m really lucky, I still get to play it for a few a minutes. He loved On The Old Rugged Cross and I have sheet music of his still. I think his favorite instrument to play was his fiddle. Boy, could that man fiddle! When his brothers were still alive we would get together for family reunions and we had hours of fiddle music, singing, dancing, laughing and tons of fun. I didn’t appreciate it back then as much as I probably should have.

I remember always feeling safe around him. I was truly happy and carefree and I remember feeling loved and accepted. He had welcomed my Mom and I into his home, into his family, with open arms, with love, with compassion, and without judgment.

His name is Raymond Arthur Olson, son of Thor and Thea. He was my Grandfather on my Step-Dad’s side. He was kind and caring and gentle. His eyes always sparkled with humor and love.

I had many family members on that side that served. I’m very proud of the Olson side even though I don’t really stay in contact with many of them. There were also many on the Salte side. I have pictures of no one. All the pictures that I am showing today I got from my Great-Aunt’s family. Her daughter had posted them on Facebook and was nice enough to say I could have them as well. I would have taken them anyway to be honest but I wouldn’t have shared them.

Her dad and my Great Uncle
Lynden and Agnes Salte
Newspaper clipping reads “A mobile stretcher caught the Queen’s eye and she asked many questions. This royal visit of inspection was by no means a perfunctory affair and Their Majesties displayed a lively interest in the many new features of the up-to-date Canadian equipment.” This photo is of Joel Salte (the tall one)
January 1946 in Winnipeg. Lynden (on the left) who had been honorably discharged after contracting diphtheria before he was deployed. Howie Salte (middle) and Joel Salte home from the war.

Have a beautiful day friends and stay safe

-Ang

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Time To Clean Up

Probably should have put that bike away when we heard the snow was coming

Snow. It’s magical when it starts and for me it stirs up many wonderful and unforgettable memories. Then you see there’s about 2 inches and you think, okay I think that’s probably good now, thanks! When it continues with more snow and you can hear the wind howling outside your windows… well then you have to wonder how much longer it’s going to last. Wake up the next day to see it hasn’t really changed? Yikes.

While we got hit pretty good where I live, many places saw much more snow and wind and damage! Trees were taken down by the weight of the snow plus the wind. Cars literally buried in it. Saskatoon had good samaritans out on their ski-doos pulling/pushing people who were stuck.

8th Street in Saskatoon
Borden Bridge
Fire Exit door at the store I work at in North Battleford

The kids still insisted on going out sledding here in the village we live and I thought they were crazy but as a mom with 3 fighting kids and their friends still showing up at the door I had no choice but to help them gather their things and call out the door after them “Have fun! Don’t throw snow at faces or houses! And Ryan, NO SWEARING!”

When they weren’t outside or fighting we built a working engine, made bread, and watched some movies together. I don’t regret calling work to say I wasn’t going OR the dishes that didn’t get done. We enjoyed our weekend together (at least I did anyway).

I spoke to a friend in Ontario yesterday and my Uncle in Quebec this morning and both have beautiful +20 weather and the sun was shining! Wherever you are while reading this and whatever the weather, I hope you had a great weekend!

-Ang